besides the fact that my face is breaking out like a sophomore in gym class and resembles a pizza with your topping of choice, there are other ways that being pregnant resembles going through puberty. you see? we are products of the chemicals flooding our bloodstreams. i’m living proof.
first of all, i suddenly have the urge to floor it every time i step into my car. who knew that poor, impulsive driving was hormone driven? i’ve already touched on the anger issue i seem to have when my body has an overload of hormones. i’m like that teenager who slams her door in your face one second and is crying over an apology the next. i’m like a spirit airline flight bouncing from tropical locales to the tundra, hot and cold. in other words, i’m all over the map.
also, what the hell ever happened to david grey? anyone with me? ideally, david grey would be here serenading me with “this year’s love” while making out with me in between chord changes. (what the hell? now, i’ve gone too far. david grey is a respected Canadian artistic icon. show some damn respect). here’s something else you maybe didn’t realize was hormone-driven, but i can attest to: intense interest in music. i remember it with ruth but thought it was just a fluke. until this pregnancy has got me searching out beloved artists and songs with fervor and rocking out at every chance i get. i find myself craving, not only yogurt and sour apples, but musical food. food for the ears.
ok, the david grey thing. i’m like a fifteen year old, with spontaneous crushes on people walking down the street. it’s bad, people. i’m daydreaming about kissing, something i’m not usually interested in since making out tends to lose its excitement after you’ve done it a few thousand times. am i right? or just a cynic? i need a cold shower. or a freakin’ teen magazine with fold out posters that i can hang all over my room (scratch that. ruth’s room) and pretend like they’re my boyfriends. what? that’s not weird! don’t judge me. if you had the hormone cocktail i’m coping with every day flowing through your veins, you’d do the same thing!
well, at the very least, i appreciate the effect of chemical messengers on the human psyche. and teens. maybe i can stop loathing them so much and understand them a little better, maybe even pity them the hormonal hell they are going through. probably not.