whine-ese

whine

to utter a low, usually nasal, complaining cry or sound, as from uneasiness, discontent, peevishness, etc.

well, ya got that right, dictionary.com.  although i’m not sure that anything that comes from ruth’s mouth could be classified as “low”.  she usually has two pitches.  high pitched and breakin’ glass high pitched.  nasal, yes.  cry is good.  i dunno about uneasiness, but a big yes on the discontent and peevishness.

what is this new language that i am forced to interpret all day long lately?  suddenly, ruth has stopped speaking english and has adopted what would appear to be her native tongue: whine-ese.  it must be her native language as it comes so naturally to her.  it sounds a bit like english, but grates on the ears a lot more.  kind of like german.  wow, i’m a politically incorrect bastard.  sorry, all you germans out there.  it’s not that i can’t translate.  it’s that listening to ruth speak in this language all day is the equivalent of having someone stand really close to you and honk a horn directly into your ear.  i mean, my poor ear hairs are damaged enough from all of the blink 182 and other terrible music i used to blare as a teenager.  give me a break, here.  i mean, i’m all for bilingual education for children, but this is ridiculous.

is this what people mean by the terrible twos?  not only does your child begin acting like an obsessive compulsive crazy person whose had numerous strokes, but that they also begin speaking in this whine-ese all day long?  i’ve been trying to be firm (something i’m really bad at being as wishy washy a person as i am) about putting a stop to this utter noise.  “no whining”, that’s my rule.  i try my best to inform her every time she starts that there is no whining and that she has to talk like a normal person (anyone else have a better way to put this?) before i will answer her or do what she says (yes, i’ve said before, i am her bitch.  i like to pretend i’m not, but we all know it’s just for show.  i do what i can to keep her behavior in line and keep my own sanity, but other than that, she’s runnin’ the show).  it works.  sometimes.

maybe i should just give in and start speaking it myself all day long.  see how that takes.  i should be fluent by now, having listened to as much of it as i have.

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Author: Terry

Welcome! I am a Waldorf and unschooling-inspired homeschooling parent of three, ages 2, 4, and 7 living in the Lansing area of Michigan writing from the front lines of parenthood. Join me as I try to navigate homeschooling and bask in the craziness of life with young ones. Feel free to leave a comment. I would love to hear from you! Thanks for stopping by!

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